New Dubya joke

[dv6y]

Donald Rumsfeld and his aides are giving Bush his daily briefing on
Iraq. He informs the President: "You should know that three Brazilian
soldiers were killed yesterday."

The President turns white, and slumps into his chair, looking shaken.
"Dear God," he says, lapsing into silence.

His staff exchanges puzzled and concerned glances, as Bush has never
displayed such a reaction to casualty news before. They nervously
watch the President, who sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks, "OK, tell me again, how many
are there in a brazillion?"

[TripMcNeely]

Ahh. A Blonde joke replaced with the Dub. Hellarious.

[triggercut1]

Q: What's the President's position on Roe v. Wade?

A: He doesn't care how people get out of New Orleans.

[Johnny H]

QUOTE(dvyyyyyy @ Sep 29 2005, 04:52 PM) Quoted post

Donald Rumsfeld and his aides are giving Bush his daily briefing on
Iraq. He informs the President: "You should know that three Brazilian
soldiers were killed yesterday."

The President turns white, and slumps into his chair, looking shaken.
"Dear God," he says, lapsing into silence.

His staff exchanges puzzled and concerned glances, as Bush has never
displayed such a reaction to casualty news before. They nervously
watch the President, who sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks, "OK, tell me again, how many
are there in a brazillion?"
[/b][/quote]

well played.

[madyaks]

Dude that is fucking great!!

[Prngr44]

This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally.
The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous. Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line.



You are in Florida; Miami to be specific.


There is chaos all around you caused by a hurricane with severe flooding.


This is a flood of biblical proportions. You are a photojournalist
working for a major newspaper and you're caught in the middle of this
epic disaster.


The situation is nearly hopeless.


You're trying to shoot career-making photos.


There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing
under the water.


Nature is unleashing all of its destructive fury.


Suddenly you see a man floundering in the water.


He is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken down with the
debris.


You move closer. Somehow the man looks familiar.


You suddenly realize who it is. It's George W. Bush!


At the same time you notice that the raging waters are about to take
him under... forever.


You have two options – you can save the life of G.W. Bush or you can
shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of
one of the world's most powerful men.


So here's the question, and please give an honest answer:



Would you select high contrast color film, or would you go with the
classic simplicity of black and white?=

[Glovey]

QUOTE(Prngr44 @ Sep 29 2005, 07:36 PM) Quoted post

This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally.
The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous. Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line.



You are in Florida; Miami to be specific.


There is chaos all around you caused by a hurricane with severe flooding.


This is a flood of biblical proportions. You are a photojournalist
working for a major newspaper and you're caught in the middle of this
epic disaster.


The situation is nearly hopeless.


You're trying to shoot career-making photos.


There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing
under the water.


Nature is unleashing all of its destructive fury.


Suddenly you see a man floundering in the water.


He is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken down with the
debris.


You move closer. Somehow the man looks familiar.


You suddenly realize who it is. It's George W. Bush!


At the same time you notice that the raging waters are about to take
him under... forever.


You have two options – you can save the life of G.W. Bush or you can
shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of
one of the world's most powerful men.


So here's the question, and please give an honest answer:



Would you select high contrast color film, or would you go with the
classic simplicity of black and white?=
[/b][/quote]
Dupe.

b&

[Daisy Mae]

Dear Abby,

My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning and when I confront him, he denies everything. What's worse, everyone knows he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also, since he lost his job four years ago he hasn't even looked for a new one. All he does is buy cigars and cruise around and bullshit with his pals, while I have to work to pay the bills. Since our daughter went away to college he doesn't even pretend to like me and hints that I am a lesbian.

What should I do?

Signed, Clueless




Dear Clueless,

Grow up and dump him. For Pete's sake, you don't need him anymore. You're a United States Senator from New York, act like it!

[madyaks]

Even in a joke thread they gotta bring up Clinton....


LOL

[Daisy Mae]

Bumper Stickers for the GOP, 2004 --

1 Bush/Cheney '04: Four More Wars!

2 Bush/Cheney '04: Apocalypse Now!

3 Bush/Cheney '04: Because the truth just isn't good enough.

4 Bush/Cheney '04: Compassionate Colonialism

5 Bush/Cheney '04: Leave no billionaire behind

6 Bush/Cheney '04: Over a billion whoppers served.

7 Bush/Cheney '04: Putting the "con" in conservatism.

8 Bush/Cheney '04: Thanks for not paying attention.

9 Bush/Cheney '04: The last vote you'll ever have to cast.

10 Bush/Cheney '04: This time, elect us!

11 Bush/Cheney '04: We're Gooder!

12 Bush/Cheney: Asses of Evil

13 George W. Bush: A brainwave away from the presidency

14 Vote Bush in '04: "I Has Incumbentory Advantitude"

[Weird_English_Guy]

QUOTE(Lois Lane @ Sep 29 2005, 10:30 PM) Quoted post

Dear Abby,

My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning and when I confront him, he denies everything. What's worse, everyone knows he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also, since he lost his job four years ago he hasn't even looked for a new one. All he does is buy cigars and cruise around and bullshit with his pals, while I have to work to pay the bills. Since our daughter went away to college he doesn't even pretend to like me and hints that I am a lesbian.

What should I do?

Signed, Clueless




Dear Clueless,

Grow up and dump him. For Pete's sake, you don't need him anymore. You're a United States Senator from New York, act like it!
[/b][/quote]

[img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/unsure.gif[/img]

[lazydaze]

QUOTE(dvyyyyyy @ Sep 29 2005, 02:52 PM) Quoted post

Donald Rumsfeld and his aides are giving Bush his daily briefing on
Iraq. He informs the President: "You should know that three Brazilian
soldiers were killed yesterday."

The President turns white, and slumps into his chair, looking shaken.
"Dear God," he says, lapsing into silence.

His staff exchanges puzzled and concerned glances, as Bush has never
displayed such a reaction to casualty news before. They nervously
watch the President, who sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks, "OK, tell me again, how many
are there in a brazillion?"
[/b][/quote]


[img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif[/img]

excellent

[dv6y]

QUOTE

8 Bush/Cheney '04: Thanks for not paying attention.
[/b][/quote]

I like that. [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif[/img]

[StlJoe]

Instead of using their energy to poke fun of President Bush, maybe Democraps should pool their resources and create a strategy to win a phuckin election.... BRAHHHHHHHHHHH! [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/tongue.gif[/img]

[jhanke]

QUOTE(StlJoe @ Oct 3 2005, 12:13 PM) Quoted post

Instead of using their energy to poke fun of President Bush, maybe Democraps should pool their resources and create a strategy to win a phuckin election.... BRAHHHHHHHHHHH! [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/tongue.gif[/img]
[/b][/quote]
you're still here?