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Nougat is The Bitch

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  • Nougat is The Bitch

    Self Gratification Awards

    of the Day Award
    For the most unnecessary - but coolest - product, website, or doodad of the day.


    Nougat is the unsung hero of the candy world. Or, to put it in a converse contrapositive sort of way, chocolate is the Pol Pot of the candy world.

    What makes chocolate like a 20th-century dictator? Who knows. The point is: chocolate is an asshole.

    Not since peanut butter has another person been so maligned and taken advantage of as nougat. Chocolate continues to take all the credit, and nougat crawls along like chocolate's bitch, happy as hell just to receive an occasional line like "with delicious, creamy nougat" in a stupid TV commercial.

    But nougat will always be the bitch. Because (god dammit), what is it that comes "with" nougat? Chocolate! (Haven't you been paying attention?)

    It's time to give nougat a chance. No, not peace. They tried giving peace a chance in the 60s, and all they got was a bunch of stupid hippies. Maybe if they had given nougat a chance instead, the Black Panthers and SDS wouldn't have hurt so many goddamn people. "Peace" loving bastards.
    Official Lounge Sponsor of lasvegasreb and his shoes.