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No Chance
The radio announcers sounded confident – and why not? The Philadelphia Phillies boast one of the best pitching rotations in baseball history. They won 102 games, a franchise record. Rollins, Utley, Howard already own one championship ring.
“Prohibitive favorites,” the announcers called them.
The 2011 St. Louis Cardinals have no chance.
Two of the starters are injured. The bullpen has been a work in progress all year. The best pitcher was knocked out of action before the season ever began.
No chance.
This is not a particularly new position. In fact, it's part of the Redbird DNA.
In 1926, the Cardinals won the National League pennant and prepared to face the New York Yankees.
Ruth. Gehrig. Lazerri. The next year's Yankees team would be declared the greatest in baseball history.
The Cardinals had no chance. In the seventh game, with seven outs to go and a one-run lead, they gave the ball to a hungover Grover Cleveland Alexander, who had pitched a complete-game victory the day before.
And the Cardinals won their first World Series.
Take the Gas House Gang. No way they could win the 1934 World Series, not with Dizzy Dean getting beaned while breaking up a double play (“X-Ray of Dean's head shows nothing,” the headline said), not with Joe Medwick ordered off the field by the baseball commissioner in Game 7.
You want long odds? Somebody explain how a kid from Denora, Pa., could be signed by the Cardinals as a pitcher, then go on to win seven batting titles, three MVP awards and three World Series titles. He collects 3,630 hits – the same number on the road as at home.
Oh, yes, he also turns out to be one of the kindest and most generous human beings to walk the planet. It's impossible, of course, but should such a person exist, you'd build a statue in honor of that man.
No way the Cardinals of 1964 could win the NL pennant, not sitting 6.5 games behind with 12 to play. Not a chance the Cubs would be dumb enough to trade a future Hall of Famer for a pitcher who would go on to win seven more games. (OK, some things are possible.)
All the Redbirds had to do to win the World Series that year was to knock off the mighty New York Yankees. The Yankees of Mantle, Maris, and Ford.
You gonna take that bet?
You going to wager that the Cardinals, down 2-1 in the series and 3-0 on the scoreboard, would see Kenny Boyer hit a grand-slam that nearly kissed the foul pole in left?
No chance.
The Cardinals were doomed again three years later. The 1967 team had a great run, but you knew it was over the instant Roberto Clemente slammed a pitch into Bob Gibson's right leg, breaking it.
Come on, you're telling me that Gibson would then pitch three complete game victories in the World Series? Whom do you think you are kidding?
The 1982 team? The opening day line-up included Dane Iorg in left, Steve Braun at third and a skinny, slick-fielding shortstop who would finish the season hitting .248.
But in the long history of Redbird improbabilities, simply nothing matches 2006. The team limped into the playoffs with 83 wins. The shortstop was a midget with a lion's heart. The closer was a rookie. The best player on the team had been the 402nd overall pick in the 1999 MLB draft.
Flash forward to Game 7 of the NLCS. The Cardinals have a 1-run lead. The Mets have the bases loaded. Standing at the plate was Carlos Beltran, who had hit 70 home runs in 20 at-bats against the Cardinals in previous play-off games (yes, I'm exaggerating, but only slightly).
The rookie, Adam Wainwright whiffs him on three straight pitches.
But then the Cardinals had to beat Detroit in the World Series. That wasn't going to happen, not with a another rookie starting the opening game, not with a cast-off starting Game 5.
"Tigers in 3." They should print that on the championship flag that flutters at Busch Stadium.
Which brings us to 2011.
The franchise had to set a modern-day record for Most Times Fans Have Given Up on A Team. Too slow, lousy defense, a closer who couldn't close.
Down 10.5 games in the Wild Card race on Aug. 24. Put a fork in 'em.
Then came the Big Tease. The Cardinals started winning, the Braves started losing, but just when it appeared they were going to catch up, the Redbirds cough up a four-run lead in the ninth inning to the Mets with a week left in the season. Put another fork in 'em, this time for good.
We never learn, do we? If the history of sports – and the history of the Cardinals – has taught us anything, it's that the impossible sometimes occurs. A back-up catcher steals home. A shy kid named Willie McGee hits two home runs and robs Milwaukee of one in the 1982 World Series. Enos Slaughter scores on a mad dash from first on a single. “Go crazy, folks! Go crazy!” You never, ever know.
Tomorrow night, the St. Louis Cardinals will begin another chapter in this too-good-to-be-true script.
They will take the field against the Philadelphia Phillies, 11 games away from Title No 11.
Once again, thank God, they will have no chance.
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